Judge 1:
As a first-timer at College Night, I was excited to see the second entirely produced student show of the evening and was immediately drawn to the look, feel, and texture used in the show’s opening scene. The overture also drew me in and made me curious about the story that was about to unfold on stage—it was also beautifully played by the orchestra. This show had a narrative style that helped tell the story’s events. Characters were well established in the script, with defined relationships, active actions, and tactics in their choice as actors. Relationships and stakes were high during the entire piece, and this created a suspenseful storyline that moved along well.
Meeting the Iron Witch (Mia Wilson) was full of spectacle, hooked me into the story, and successfully set the mood and tone of the story. The bond of sisters was brought to life very believably by the actors in the roles of Sasha (Lily Collins) and Natalia (Charisa Moore). The duet “Mother I Knew” was a beautiful song. It was heartfelt, and the singing and acting were vulnerable, a testament to the cast’s talent and dedication. The role of Thaddeus (Cameron Corbitt) was quirky and fun to watch. The role of Cedric (D’Mar Tarront-Milton) was compelling, with strong singing and commitment as an actor. The entire ensemble and every voice came together beautifully and powerfully throughout this show. All should be proud of this excellent performance.
The design of this show was awe-inspiring for an all-student production; the color palette of the set, costumes, and lighting all worked well together, creating a visually stunning experience. The props were all designed well, and the book of spells that lit up was a memorable and unique touch. Transitions and scene shifts were all smooth, and the transition to Forgeville was a joy to watch, and the song The Forgeville Pirate’s Clan was one of the many examples of strong ensemble work found in this production. Costumes helped define character, and the use of texture and unique materials was evident in the Iron Ensemble characters, giving the clever appearance of a heavy iron-like metal material. Incorporating the larger-than-life dragon puppet was a delight, and the look and movement of the puppet were magical.
This show was presented at a professional level. The characters, family conflict, music, dancing, singing, and all aspects of design (lighting, scenic, costumes) drew me in for a memorable theatrical experience. I truly hope this show has a future with more performances on or off campus, as it has the potential to captivate audiences and leave a lasting impression. The Legacy of the Iron Witch would be an excellent addition to a theatre festival, or a part of the season offered by a theatre company.
Congratulations to all for collaborating on this memorable and moving musical theatre production.
Judge 2:
The script was very well done. The story moved quickly, it evolved naturally, the situational language was clever, and the characters were well defined. Everything up to the final scene was well thought out. The final scene was good, but in comparison to how the previous scenes unfolded, the pace of the drama slowed down.
The lyrics were engaging and pertinent to each character and the character’s development. Even in the Dragon Bar, the lyrics managed to help move the show. During the large ensembles, I caught most of the lyrics… I just wanted all of them.
The direction was well done. Straight forward and purposeful, with motion (for the most part) incorporated when it was intimated in the text or needed to further the scene.
The Choreography was clever and fun. Some of the most effective blocking and choreography was based on some of the simplest moves. The more aggressive and difficult moves were handled by those with some wonderful skills. Very judicious use of the talent! Very effective!
The acting was very well done… strong characters, well defined, and with specific intent(s).
The singing was good… Each person was able to use their voice, and the qualities of each individual voice matched the persona of the character.
The Dance and Movement was well thought out by the choreographers and, for the most part, the movement and dance contributed to propelling the action forward. The Bar choreography may not have propelled the action forward, but that scenes has an “Eleventh Hour” feel to it (well… it was near 11:00 pm when it occurred). It was great fun and very much a crowd pleaser.
The orchestration was good, I enjoyed the different musical styles. One aspect of the musical writing that stood out the most was the part writing for the vocal parts! Well done here! The use of harmony was an excellent choice; but even more significant and impactful was the overlaying of everyone’s vocal parts – well done, and very sophisticated!
Overall, the costume choices were very cool! The only question I have was in regard to the skirt choices for the two younger sisters. Nothing wrong, but they didn’t seem to fit as well, aesthetically, as with the rest of the costumes.
The sets were well done. They indicated everything we needed to know about where we were in the show, yet they were simple and effective.
The Hair and Make-up worked very well. I loved the look of the villager’s part human/part metallic look – unique to each individual.
The creativity of the props used was extremely well done… I loved the reveals, the lit book, the emergence of Mother from the daughter, the table that was used indifferent scenes.
The lighting was very well done. The most impressive aspect of your work here was the connection of the lighting (and sound) to the action on stage… very tight work between the actor, light tech and sound tech – extremely well done. As part of the show’s spectacle, this was one of the highlights.
Overall… the show was extremely impactful. It clearly told the story, had moments of fun, danger, sorrow, anger, jealousy, spitefulness and redemption. It was a joy to watch. Well done, Purple!!!!!!!
Judge 3:
Script: I thought the script was phenomenal. It was a very solid hero’s journey-type premise, with very clear objectives for the characters and fabulously imaginative worldbuilding. I really felt like all the fairytale elements, from the cursed iron people to the innkeeper being a dragon, were super original. The relationship of the three sisters was well-established and believable. And each of the characters had a distinctive personalities and pretty decently fleshed-out backstories, and were important to the plot. Events proceeded in a very clear fashion due to the clear laying out of expectations from the Prophecy. That was a great device to keep track of what had happened and what was to come, and you did a good job of weaving it in as a recurring motif to remind the audience. So the structure of the story was really solid. My main criticisms were the beginning and end. I wasn’t clear on the backstory at the beginning, partly because of the problems with intelligibility of the intro narration. And throughout the show, I did not understand why the girls didn’t believe their mother was evil. I’m not sure if I missed something or if that just wasn’t explained. In Forgeville, I wasn’t sure how she knew that Cedric was the man from the prophecy. It was just that he had a feeling. Which, ok, she has magical powers so I can accept some level of clairvoyance, but it felt like a bit of a copout, story-wise. If there was a better reason she knew, I missed it. It wasn’t as solidly-established as a lot of the other plot details. Then at the end, it seemed like everything kinda fell apart. I didn’t understand why the Witch suddenly turned good if she wasn’t the one that the forget spell hit. Did it kind of partially hit her? I see what you did with the callback to the earlier Forget spell, which was smart, but it again felt like a little bit of a copout. If she had that spell the whole time, why did she wait? Is there really no other spell she could have cast? When you introduce magic as a plot device, it kind of opens up a can of worms about what is and isn’t possible. Like, why could she make people forget but the others couldn’t? Or why couldn’t the girls combine their powers to restrain the Witch in another way? Why was “forgetting” specifically the only viable option? It felt slightly random or out of nowhere in the moment. Then, after the spell, I was like, why is that one (Natalia? Sorry I might be mixing them up) just lying on the floor this whole scene and song and nobody has noticed or said anything? Why did Helena wait to stop the Witch until after she killed Cedric? Why don’t they have any healing magic for him? Anyway I started to be very confused. It felt a little like y’all ran out of time to tie up the plot and so you were just trying to find a way to end it. And I was very confused about why she suddenly became a good Witch. So, the writing was so so so strong for most of the show; I was super on board with almost everything. It just kind of went off the rails at the end a little. Overall, super well-written and I think the ending could be improved without too much tweaking. But most of all, I will never forgive you for killing Cedric.
Lyrics: Overall, very clear, not too wordy, and well-set. There were a few moments of awkward scansion and slightly sus rhymes throughout the show, with a few examples I noted below. That takes me out of the moment, when a phrase rolls off the tongue in an unnatural way from a character who otherwise speaks normally (that is also a note for music though—not all on you). Mostly, I would encourage you to dig deeper with your lyrics. A fair amount of them were pretty repetitive and sort of restating the same general idea with different words, and stating the surface-level events taking place on stage, rather than taking the character on any kind of emotional journey or revealing a deeper truth. My favorites were the “Pirate’s Clan,” and “Scales and Passion,” which gave you room to explore different side characters that we wouldn’t otherwise get to know, and especially “Scales,” spoke to me with its message of radical acceptance, as long as you can party. Rock on. Songs all came at moments that felt appropriate. But I encourage you, as I did with the other team, to dig deeper as you write lyrics, and see what truths you can uncover or what else we can learn about the characters.
Score: Overall, I thought the sonic world you created was compelling. It was moody and atmospheric, and I especially loved the otherworldly ensemble vocals. Definite air of mystery and magic. Well done! The choice of instruments was great too, there were lots of little surprises throughout. In general, I thought the accompaniment was a little low in the mix or sparse, and I would have liked it to support the vocals a little more. There could have been a little more going on. It’s a hard line to tread, since you don’t want to step on the vocals and you have to consider intelligibility. But sometimes I felt the music lacked energy and was kind of more bass-pitched rather than covering the full spectrum, and often the rhythms were a bit square. Most of the lyrics were clearly set, but there were a few moments of clunky scansion. That would have been either a time to rewrite your melody so it flows more like natural speech or to demand your lyricist rewrite it, haha. As I note below, some of the songs felt a little too similar to each other in terms of groove, tempo, and the rhythmic shape of the melodies. But you did also have some good variety in your score, between the Pirate number, the Sleeping Dragon, and the Prophecy.
Direction: Stellar work. Everything felt geared toward telling the story, from the props to the set to the costumes to the way the sound and lights were choreographed to the actors’ movements to bring the magic spells to life. Everything felt of a piece in the fantasy world you created and every scene had some sort of surprise that kept me leaning forward. From the first very subtle moment where they are making the potion and the lights flashed, to the books on the shelf suddenly moving, to the spell book coming up out of the table, to the recurring “whoosh” sound effect we learned to associate with spells being cast, to the FRIGGIN’ DRAGON breathing FRIGGIN SMOKE?! You created a super smart symbolic language for your story and it was just nonstop fun, “what’s gonna happen next?” and then being continually surprised. And it was a slow build, too, starting with small effects and building, each one topping the last. Those moments of astonishment and magic, even when they are super low tech (maybe ESPECIALLY when they are low-tech?) are what I think theatre is all about. Although I did have some trouble understanding things, I thought for the most part I was with you, and events proceeded at a pace I could follow. Overall just super engaging. I was leaning forward the whole time.
Choreography: Some great dance numbers, especially the big pirate and tavern numbers, with some very impressive feats from certain individuals. And the scary twitchy evil henchmen were delightful as well. All the different different music vibes gave you a good opportunity to utilize a variety of styles which was great, like those last three examples. The only part I thought was a little off was the opening number, when as I note below, I felt like the choreo was weirdly stumpy and angry/intense-looking, while the music and the singing were more on the jubilant/joyful side. But well done overall!
Acting: There were a few moments where I couldn’t understand some lines or lyrics due to actors rushing or not speaking clearly, but they were very strong performances all around. All the leads were very engaging, and Drew absolutely stole the show. I also loved the physicality of Helena’s possessed moments. It was super convincing, and the magic spells were all very convincing too, well-choreographed and executed. I very much enjoyed how both shows had delightfully mustache-twirling (metaphorically of course) female villains. The sisters’ chemistry was good, as was Cedric and Natalia’s (I think she was the one? Again, sorry I may be mixing the sisters up). Cedric was very charming. And the physicality and presence of the ensemble added great texture to everything, like the twitching fingers and heads of the Witch’s henchmen and the clanking gaits of the metal men.
Singing: Lovely singing overall. Harmonies were in tune and had a great atmospheric quality. Most of the lyrics were intelligible in the solo or small group songs. I had a little more trouble understanding some of the bigger company numbers like the pirates and the tavern, but I mostly got the gist. Well done, cast!
Dancing: As noted above under choreography, some great individual dance performers were featured, like in the tavern, and the group numbers were all pretty tight to my eye.
Orchestra: The orchestration was very ambitious, with its full horn/wind section and orchestral percussion, and I was here for it! Very well performed and conducted. Everything sounded tight and well-rehearsed. Only one or two minor flubs here and there that I could hear, but nonetheless I was super impressed. There were a couple times when I thought the orchestra was being under-used, and it felt a little flat. It could have been the mix; sometimes it’s hard to say, but as I note below it sometimes felt a little low-end heavy and lacked sparkle. But then other times it was very sparkly! Well done on the whole.
Costumes: The costumes of the metal people in Forgeville were super imaginative. Apart from the very idea of the characters being part metal being very creative and original, they were brought to life really creatively by their costumes. I loved the raggedy vibe of everyone that really tied in with the raggedy look of the set. Each costume was unique but really had its own unique flair if you looked closely.
Set: Excellent work. The organic, raggedy look with found objects poking out here and there lent a great fairytale-meets-post-apocalyptic vibe to the whole thing. The “iron” motif was well-incorporated, yet another example of that overarching singular vision tying everything together. The Different locations were distinct, and there were so many great details, like the dressing of the sisters’ house and the tavern bar signs. Not sure what the little mermaid was doing up there but I got a kick out of her!
Hair and makeup: All very excellent. You had your work cut out for you with all your “disfigured” characters such as the Metal Men and you delivered. They looked excellent and everyone’s look fit in with the show’s overall derelict fairytale aesthetic. There might have been a way to go further with it since nothing particularly JUMPED out at me the way certain other elements of the production did. But still great.
Props: Stellar. During the scene in the sisters’ house I wrote down, “props on point!” All the set dressing, potion stuff, super creative and lovely. I was legit caught off guard by how good these were. I’ve already written a bunch about how impressed I was with the stage magic, much of which was props-related. And I’d like to give you EXTRA props (pun fully intended) for committing 200% to proper properties and really going above and beyond, because it’s only worth 5 points on the rubric—which said to me that you really cared and you recognized how it elevated the show overall. You really made the magic happened and I think without these props the show would have been so much less engaging, entertaining, and convincing as a whole. So creative, you should be very proud. I would have given 10 points out of 5 if that were allowed.
Lighting Design: Ditto a lot of what I said about props. Y’all hit it out of the park with the special effects, from the storm to the magic spells to the smoking dragon and practical lights inside props and set pieces. It was essential to creating the immersive world of the show. Mad kudos.
Running: Everything was super tight and I was especially impressed by how well the tech elements were synced to the action. I didn’t catch a single hiccup. Excellent job.
Overall Effect of Production: I applaud the collaboration. I put comments in various sections but I have no doubt it was a fantastic team effort to put this together and my congratulations are addressed to the group. Whether it was a director, writer, or one designer or other, who had any given idea, everything came together in something that really felt unified and everything depended on everything else. The pacing of surprises was great—you kept one-upping yourselves. Each scene seemed to ask the question, how can we make this more magical? You didn’t blow your creative load all at once. First there was just a liiiiittle mini flicker of the lights when they were making the potion and said “star power,” and I was like, “ooh!” and leaned forward a bit. And THEN a minute later you hit us with the books moving around on the shelf. I wrote down, “YES set magic!!! 10/10. I’m invested. True moments of astonishment.” And only THEN did you hit us with the spell book coming out of the cauldron, the light inside the spell book, and the damn dragon. All really low-tech little touches that make SUCH a big difference in creating your world and just raised the caliber of the whole thing. And the thing is, half the time I knew sort of how you did it, like I know there was someone inside the table to stick that spell book up out of the cauldron. I knew the Witch was gonna come out from under that cloak at the end. But damned if I know how you got either of them under there without me noticing. There is even magic in the staging, the execution of the illusion. So, huge kudos for all of that and all the rest. Costumes, set, music, lights and sound design, all the elements, all felt like parts of a single unified vision, reinforcing each other. There were some issues with intelligibility, where actors may have been rushing or not speaking clearly, like in the opening narration and the group numbers and underscored moments, and I thought storywise the ending fell a bit flat. I had some critiques of the music and lyrics. There are various areas of opportunity where I might encourage the writers to revisit and see if they can punch things up. But overall, such creative work. I had a great time.
Song-by-song notes:
“(Now That) The Witch is Gone:” I love that you had an overture! Always nice to hear the band get to shine for a moment. But ahhhhhh it needed to be louder! People in the audience didn’t stop talking. 
When the curtains opened and the intro song began, it was a great mysterious vibe. I really loved the ethereal vocal harmonies there. BUT. The voiceover was WAY too fast, and too quiet. I had no idea what was happening. And that made it kind of a rocky start because clearly if you have voiceover in your opening number it is giving me some important backstory that I shouldn’t miss. You gotta make dang sure the audience can hear every word. Like Galadriel in Fellowship of the Ring. So, that was a downer. Other first impressions: the costumes are great, and the set is super cool and creative. Very effective spooky fantasy vibes. Now, once the main verse started, this song was 100% giving “Good News,” from Wicked, but you did take it in a little bit of a different direction so I didn’t find it overly derivative. I have no doubt you expected that comparison would be made. The lyrics were maybe a little bit repetitive and surface-level, just kind of listing all the things that we can do now that she’s gone. I’d encourage you to find something deeper to comment on, or make it funnier or cleverer in some way, or else maybe shorten it. The choreography struck me as oddly stompy, for such an otherwise jubilant scene. There was one line in this number that caught my ear with some clunky scansion, the rhyme of: “like her” and “rumor,” where the emphasis was on the wrong syllable.
“Mother I knew:” I wrote, “Ooh Glock and bassoon. Good orch. V impressed.” From the first number to this one, the orchestration was unique and created a unique sound world for the piece. The lyrics, unfortunately, were a bit surface-level for me. Once Sasha’s basic thoughts were established (she misses her mom), it did not really go anywhere new with her character or the story. It was just kind of repeating that basic feeling in different ways. And although the music was pretty, I found the rhythms a little stiff. I thought they could be hipper, have more energy and forward momentum. But the harmonies between the sisters were lovely and really well-sung!
“The Prophecy:” Taylor had some awesome physicality in this moment of becoming possessed, as well as a cool vocal timbre. I also noted that so far, apart from the voiceover in the opening number, All the dialogue and action had been very clear and easy to understand.
“The Forgeville Pirate’s Clan:” Great choreo for this number! Very entertaining. Who doesn’t love a good pirate song? In the following scene, I was wondering how she knew that Cedric was the one they were looking for. I’m not sure if that was just a nuance I missed because I couldn’t understand every word, or if it was glossed over by the writers. I wouldn’t have liked some clarification. The thunderstorm was a great integration of light and sound. More excellent stagecraft.
“What Would She Do:” I was super impressed by D’Mar’s voice. Love a good bass solo! We need more of that in musical theatre. Musically, I enjoyed that the melody wasn’t too repetitive, but I thought the chord progression was maybe a little too similar to one or more of the other songs in a way that felt slightly recycled (Maybe “The Mother I knew”? Sorry my notes are not perfect). But, the melody being different made up for it pretty well. And the accompaniment felt a little same-samey, like it could have used a little more ear candy or more complex arrangement. It wasn’t as interesting as the prior numbers. But then I wrote, “Yes harmonies!”
“The Duel:” The music is so atmospheric! Love that element of your sound world every time it recurs. Some weird scansion again, with the lyrics. I felt like it lacked energy overall though—maybe it could have used some percussion or other more rhythmic element to the groove. I also wrote, “ooh scary dancers!”
“Scales and Passion:” Loved Willow’s performance here. I loled at the lyric, “Welcome to all unless you can’t take your alcohol.” Well done there. It tickled me that both shows had a bar song of sorts, which may or may not have been necessary to the plot of the show but was a lot of fun in both cases. As I said in my comments to GV, it’s always good to consider while writing, whether a song would be missed if you cut it. Especially with this type of semi-diegetic song where it’s sort of one group of characters performing for another group, and doesn’t contain anything vital to the plot or characters. But, it’s a balancing act between songs being too plotty and expositional, and having songs that are just fun. In this case, I didn’t feel it was strictly necessary and did kind of momentarily distract from the main plot, but I was here for it because it had a message of acceptance that seemed like it was important to the writers to convey (Perhaps there was some business going on with our heroines during the song that I missed amid the commotion, I’m not sure). And I loved that the song was like, a little bit scary? But at the same time about acceptance and community. It had an edge to it that was fun and original. Now it would have been better if that message of acceptance had broader implications to the story as a whole, like as a microcosm, but that didn’t seem to be what the main story was about. But anyway, next I wrote, “OMG DRAGON PUPPET!!!” So, you got my attention back with that. I was so immersed in this moment that I forgot to write down whether there was even music here. Probably! If there was, it worked perfectly with everything else to create a truly awesome dramatic moment. If there wasn’t, well it was still great!
Next, I think there was some underscoring or another musical moment that’s not in the program? So, I’m not totally sure what song this was in retrospect. I wrote, “Everything is in 3/4.” Which wouldn’t necessarily be a problem but I think something about the groove of each song was starting to sound a little same-y to me by this point. I think it’s a combination of the rhythm of the accompaniment, and the rhythm that a lot of the melodies ended up falling into. It might be worth looking at the lyrics and seeing if they tend to be of similar poetic meter and how can we either vary that up a bit, or how can we set them in a more unexpected way? I also wrote down “Hidden/forgiven,” as a rhyme that jumped out at me as not being a true rhyme. There were a few instances of that and sometimes it can be ok, but in this case I think they are a little too far apart and it took me out of the moment. I’ll pass on something incredibly scathing that one of my professors once said when someone asked about slant rhymes: “I’ve always just called that not a rhyme.” I’m remembering now that I think that line was a callback to “the Prophecy,” but I had just missed that line the first time around. Which actually I want to give you kudos for—you repeated several things enough that I was able to get a lot of details even if I missed it the first time (very Into the Woods of you!)—but the repetition wasn’t too much. I believe I recall a professor saying once that Shakespeare always gives an important piece of information three times.
“End of the Line:” Again with the 3/4, if I am deciphering my notes correctly! I thought this song needed more oomph. It felt a little awkward. Maybe it needed some more rhythm or a faster tempo. It just felt, like a couple of the other songs, a little low energy for what was going on. The moment of colored footlights on each of the characters was dope and yet another cool theatrical surprise moment, and the harmonies, like almost all in this show, were gorge. The ending on “forget,” though, felt weird. Like, anticlimactic somehow. Like there was all this buildup and then suddenly she was just able to do this? But why didn’t she do it before? I got that it was a callback to her previously casting that spell on Thaddeus and company, but it felt a little too easy somehow. It was unsatisfying.
“Cora’s Lament:” I don’t remember what this song was exactly because I just wrote, “what is happening.” After going so strong for the majority of the show, it felt like everything was unraveling a little bit, narrative-wise. See my Script note above.
“Finale:” You reprised “The Witch is Gone,” which is a common technique (reprising the opening for your finale), but unfortunately that wasn’t your strongest song, so you began and ended with less than your strongest material. It might have been better, for instance, to reprise part of “Scales and Passion,” which had such a great message about accepting people for who they are and finding fellowship among misfits. That would have justified that song better as well as infusing that message into the show as a final takeaway, something that perhaps the Iron Witch had been preventing, as she turned people against each other? (Again, maybe you had that subtext in there but I did miss a decent amount of lines throughout the show) The repeated lyric “finally back together” was a also bit weak, unfortunately. I can see that you’re back together. What else can we say about this ending? What’s the emotional core we can cut to here? How do we really rebuild after such trauma? I loved the final moment (which I was expecting) of one of them (was it Sasha?) picking up the evil spell book. Great ending picture.
